Some People Just Suck!!!!!

I have a huge bone to pick. And I bet you can't tell what it's about. Yup, monkeys flipping me off. hahaha. gotcha.

People that can't stand to see someone else having a good time. Especially if that good time does NOT include them. My cousin has left and gone home. I miss her already. I miss staying up late and giggling like schoolgirls. I miss our heart to heart conversations. Nope, the bone is not about her having to go home.

The bone to pick is about jealousy. We shall call the jealous one boohoo. I planned to have my dear cousin come to my house while her husband and boys were on a week long river trip with most the members of his family. Ok, most male members of the family. While she was down here she called boohoo, a female member of the family and told her she was in town. Boohoo wasn't answering her phone so a message was left for her to call my cell phone since her cell phone has lovely roaming charges. A day later, boohoo calls my phone and leaves a message saying, "when cousin is done having fun with you, have her call me". First of all, we won't NOT be having fun, so I guess she won't be calling. hahaha, kidding, geez.

Sorry, jealousy part again. I tell cousin to give her a call. First time she calls, boohoo says, I'm busy, I can't talk right now. Hangs up. Freaking hangs up. Cousin waits all the next day for her to call back. She doesn't so cousin calls her again. Again, she's busy, can't talk. Alrighty then. I guess she doesn't want to talk. Later, cousin posts on the Devil that is called Facebook that she is having a blast hanging with me and my daughter. One of her friends comments, how long you here for, it would be fun to see you. Cousin replies that this time is full of family, and Boohoo comments "When she says family, she means just her cousin! I am her sissy and I have yet to see Miss Cousin and she has been here a whole week already!"

Sidebar: Quotes equals copied and pasted and only changed the name to Miss Cousin to protect the innocent.

Umm, ok. Seems to me someone has tried to call you twice and you just didn't have the time to talk. Maybe if you had, you could have seen her. Not to mention, when her hubby got down here, you were again too busy to even go to your parents house and see her then. So shut up! You upset my cousin. Me and my daughter can track you down and hurt you. Got it. DON'T UPSET MY COUSIN!!!!!!!

I'm not the type that gets jealous if someone is hanging out with someone else. I figure everyone has their time together. Life is too short. There is a time I will hang out with you, OR you, OR you. And sometimes all 3 of you at the same time. But if you AND you are hanging out, I'm not going to be jealous. One of my siblings gets jealous if I happen to be hanging out with other siblings. Just if I'M hanging out. I'm not liked by said sibling. I can live with it. It makes me hurt worse when my other sibs can't say I'm with them or else they will be on the shit list. Like I said, life is too short. Get over it. I will get told that that's not true, but I know it is. I accepted it a long time ago. And please, don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm not that stupid or delusional. Ok? Thanks

Oh, and it's the 4th of July today. I was due 53 years ago today. But I wasn't quite ready to join this crazy world, so I waited 3 more days. Happy Birthday America. May your days be merry and bright. Wait, wrong holiday.

I think if I could post this sign, I would get really rich. Whatcha think?

You Know You're Having Too Much Fun When.....

Been hangin' with my cousin this week. One of the things she wanted to do while she was here was get her hair trimmed and touched up on the color. This time we decided to go with some red, blond and lighter brown highlights. Of course, when they highlight your hair, you get this fabulous look. (she's such a good sport, smiles and everything)


When the worker bees at the salon left the room, it was just her and I. My daughter went with us too, but she was at the Quilt Store next door. Being that we can't do anything without being goofs, she started "vogueing".

This girls cracks me up like no other. Here she is in her dead pharaoh pose. Notice the unlifelike look she has going. (oh, but we were laughing our butts off so we had to take a quick picture during a non laughing moment)
Worker bees are still in the back doing whatever they do when they aren't working on customers. Amber, her stylist, told her she could get up and walk around. Oh dear, those words should have never have been spoken to the two of us. I present to you, our version of "Walk Like An Egyptian".

Omg, my gut hurts.

Here is her finished look. If you ever want to go get your hair done, and have some entertainment, give us a call. We work cheap. :)

Flip Off Friday 7.2.10

Here we are. Friday. Wow did it get here fast this week or what. At the first of the week I didn't think I would have any flip offs. I know, crazy but true. But as the week went on I had some moments. So lets give Gigi at Kludgymom some lovin for giving all of us the chance to get crap off our chests.
Dear motorcycle dudes and pickup driver dudes. WTF guys. You either go super, super fast, or super, super slow. Which means you are either scaring the shit out of me, or pissing me off to the point of swearing like a madman. You get the first deserving flip-off of the week. Take this rat bastards.......................................

To my damn nose. Thanks a whole hell of a lot for either having a stupid hair, or a teeny, tiny boogie that kept making me have to scratch, rub, or blow you. You mad me sooooo freaking mad. Take this finger and stick it.................................

Dear Egg McMuffin. I really had a craving for you on thursday. So I bought you. I separated the muffin from the egg so I could add salt and pepper to your loveliness. When I put the muffin back on, I spotted the fine, white, piece of egg shell that you so kindly left for me to bite into. Don't you know there is nothing worse than a biting down on an eggshell. Yuk. And McDonalds, I want free food for a year. Yeah you heard me right. Get on it like blue bonnet. Until then, take this......................

To the makers of ANY pac and play. Guys, and yes I know it was a MAN that designed the "wrap this around and pull it tight" piece of goodness. Why do I know you were a man? Because, as a woman, it took all in my power to get this thing closed and I couldn't even do it myself. I had to have my cousin help. And have you ever heard 2 angry women swear like truckers at the same time. Yeah, it's not pretty. So, wrap this around you and twirl......................................

This weeks winner of the double flip off is ANY grocery cart that has the wobbly wheel, bent wheel, squeaky wheel and/or any other reason the effing cart just doesn't run smoothly. I hope it really hurt when my cousin kicked you the other day. You deserved it. And also to the grocery stores that don't just send you all to the metal scrap yard. Unhappy shoppers equals, get out of there the fastest you can. So take this double flip-off and enjoy.......................................

And there you have it. The cleansing of my little angers of the week. Now get out there and have a fabulous 4th of July weekend.

Answer Me This

Why does the deliciousness of this....................................

Always cause the agony of this................................

So then I have to take this...................................

Anyone?