I’m sure you’ve all seen this welcome unwelcome sight if you have been admitted to the hospital. “We must see your urine output”. Ok. Whatever floats your boat. Glad it’s your job. Not mine.
When I got admitted to the cancer floor, I walked in the bathroom and not only see one “hat”, but two!! Ummm, what you talking about Nurse Ratched?? I see no water. You’re hiding it!! Well, guess what? You get to POOP in one of those hats!! DAILY!! Much screaming in my brain. I do not like pooping in a hat, you can not make me you big rat. I’ve never had to do that in all my hospital admissions. Ok maybe when I had C-DIFF, but that was different. Breathing, breathing. I asked her how people felt about this fine adventure. She said the female patients accepted it, but the cry baby sissy face males didn’t. Don’t know what they’re looking for in said poop, but have fun.
The first room I had, had a self leveling bed. Oh, my, gosh. That was heaven. Hospital beds are the most uncomfortable things ever. Ok, not as uncomfortable as those darn tables they put you on for procedures, but you know what I mean. When ever I moved on this gift from heaven it would inflate and deflate to fit my body. So so cool.
Your room on the cancer floor are negative pressure rooms. The door to your room is always closed unless someone is coming in and out. It has a air system in them that sucks the bad particles out. Therefore when you have visitors (before covid hit), they could come in your room without masks. But if you need to be taken down to get a procedure, or just to take a walk, you have to put on a gown, gloves, a N95 mask, and socks. They don’t want you catching any bug since you are immune compromised.
One other thing I had done on my first admission was a Bone Marrow Biopsy. They have to check to see if your bone marrow has cancer in it. If so, you might have to get a stem cell transplant. Thank goodness the shot of deadening goes into your pelvic bone, cuz that sucker hurts like living hell.
This is the needle they
It’s called a Jamshidi Needle. Even the name says JAM. For your info, the verb definition is to squeeze tightly into a space, shove something into position.
I can’t imagine the pain of feeling that needle grinding into your pelvic bone to get the sample. Let’s all take a moment of silence.
A week after I was released from the hospital, I had a cancer clinic visit. I hate to say it, but I looked kind of like this.
Here’s another stupid thing I read. On that visit they LOWERED the dose of my anti anxiety drug. Hello!!! We must have been in “too many things happening overload” to have not questioned this. Like they thought my anxiety level would go down!!
That same afternoon I had a liver clinic visit. According to my doctor, my liver enzymes were demonstrating signs of improvement. Plus, Joyous Rapture, I get to have lab work done twice a week.
I’m having the time of my li-ha-ife
No I’ve never felt this way before
Yes I swear it’s the tru-u-uth
And I owe it all to my bad liver
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