My Own Personal Olympics

I'M BACK

Wow, I can't believe it has been over a year since I've written on here.  A lot has happened in that time. But alas, I'm not going to bore you with all the details.  You're Welcome.

Hmmmm, where should I begin my summer Olympic montage. July 13.  Got on a Delta Airline Flight with my mom and cousin.  Flew to Missouri to visit my sister Emily.  We were there for a week.

In the days before we came home, I decided it was time for my own personal Olympics.  I know you are all wondering what my specialty is.  It is the

TRICATHLON

Round One  

Slipping on water in front of the fridge  

I received a 7.5 for my effort because I didn't make it to the ground.  But they added a point because I did hit my head on the cabinet and drew blood.  

Round Two

Falling out of bed

This takes a lot more skill then slipping on water.  You must be positioned just right to fall, on your bad neurophathy side, and hit the floor with a scream.  I received an 8.5 because I incurred a half point penalty for not hitting my head, and a full point for not being able to get up off the floor by myself.  

Round Three

Falling on concrete garage floor

This is by far the hardest (no pun intended) round.  Coming home during a torrential rain storm, I decided to wait in the car until it subsided.  After 10 minutes, I felt I could get into the house even with the small amount of rain coming down.  Now remember, I am using my crutches, so that is an enhancement to the score.  I make it just to the door of the garage.  I put my crutches on the inside of the door, when all the sudden, they slipped on the water that my sis and cousin brought into the garage.  

You guessed it.  SLIP.  FALLING, FALLING, FALLING.  They say before you die you see your life in slow motion.  Well, I didn't die, but I saw myself falling in slow motion.  Again, all the following happened on my right side.  Hey, when you are good at the Tricathlon, you are good.  The position I landed in was, stomach area on the plate between the outside and the inside of the garage.  Legs out on the driveway.  Flat.  Body careening to the floor.  Right arm hitting the cement on the elbow.

 (This is the slow motion part)  Hit my forehead, then my eye socket, then my cheek bone, then the final hit, my lip with my tooth biting it.  

Much running by sister and cousin to help.  Mom, who also was sitting in the car because she didn't want to fall due to both her hips having replacements, jumps out of the car.  She proceeds to cover my legs with an umbrella so they won't get wet.  They all try for, oh about 10 to 15 minutes, to help me get up.  Finally my niece goes and gets my walker.  They put towels under both my knees because I can't get on them otherwise.  Finally I'm up and hobbling into the house.  

I received the highest score they have ever seen in this race.  A 12.5.  I got extra points for falling on my face with no shattered bones.  

YEE HAW, FIRST EVER WINNER OF THE TRICATLON. 

We came home on Wednesday, and on the following Monday I'm still in a lot of pain on my upper thigh where the fun loving femur bone is.  I started worrying that I might have fractured it.  So I went in to have it looked at at the local Instacare.  They took xrays.  No fracture, but the doctor says, "girl, I don't know how you are still walking".   "You need to go see an orthopedic surgeon."  Go in about 10 days later, cuz yeah, sometimes you just have to wait for an appointment.  

They do an xray.  Low and behold, the doctor pulls up my xray, and there it is.  My hip is bad.  In his words, extreme.  Need a hip replacement.  Not only do I need a hip replacement, but it isn't the normal. 

Most the time when someone needs a hip replacement the hip ball and socket are bone on bone going up as you can see from the following photo I found on google.

Not this girl.  I have to do everything the hard way.  My ball has protruded into and through my pelvic bone.  

The doctor said he sees it but not very often.  It will be a little bit longer of a surgery.  

I guess that it was a good thing I did my own special Olympics.  Sometimes you have to think of things that happen in your life as a positive.  I'm not happy I fell, but I am happy that some of my pain will get better.  

I Went To The Toyota Dealership And All I Got Was A Dang Coffee Mug

So, how was your holiday weekend?  Mine was loads for fun.  My cousin April is in town for a couple of weeks, and I promise we have planned some great field trips for your reading adventure.  

But first.  I must discuss with you my trip to the local Toyota Dealership last Wednesday.  

You know how you and your significant other are sitting there at night, just watching the local news, and they flash a little sign thing that says, "TEXT SUCH AND SUCH NUMBER WITH THE MESSAGE SO AND SO, TO WIN THIS OR THAT"?  First of all, you are frantically trying to remember the 5 digit number they flashed to text them to.  Come on, get with the program Dazee.

What was the text and who was it to?  It was to the local Fox TV station, Fox 13, and they were giving away a Toyota RAV4.  I entered it, thinking to myself, well that was a waste of time, but what the heck, if you don't try, you won't win.  Much to my amazement, I got a phone call from the station the following week telling me that I was one of the lucky 40 that had been selected to go to the dealership to see if I could win it.  After picking my jaw up off the floor, I gave her my email address so she could send me the rules and regulations.

But wait, out of those 40, they would draw out 27 numbers, and you didn't even get to try  to win the car.  You were just out.  Dang, the pressure.  

When it was sign in time, I was assigned number 10.  I wore my number proudly.  My number was not called.  I started hyperventilating.  I was going to be one of the lucky 13 that got to draw a key and see if it set off the alarm.  

Sidebar:  This is especially a car I would like to win, because we are selling my car because of the job situation for the money, so another car would come in handy. 

It was my turn to be on live TV.  I get really nervous and silly when I'm uncomfortable.  I recorded the news that morning in case I was one of the lucky ones.  It was my turn to choose a key, walk up to the RAV4, and push the panic button.

(I took these pictures off of my TV, so sorry about the quality)

Pushing the panic button

As you can tell, the alarm did not sound

The camera man thought that I was a good person to keep the camera on.

Me walking away 

Continuing to walk, camera man in tow

Me getting my wonderful parting gift.

It was fun, but I was super sad I didn't win.  But April, Mr Dazee, my daughter and her kids got a tremendous kick out of my pouty lip.  

I did try to get one of the office chairs out of the manager of the dealership.  They were freaking comfortable.  I was working it people.  He of course was having nothing to do with it.  I was like, oh come on, what's another 100 dollar chair, you just gave away an expensive car.  The jerk.  I even mentioned the word, 'FREE ADVERTISING' on my blog.  Too bad so sad, he ain't getting it now.

Can I Just Say, W.O.W.

By The Way

I am alive and well.  Apparently, that saying of "things always happen in three's" is a correct statement.  Who would've thunk.

September 2012
My brother is life flighted to a hospital in Idaho Falls from Yellowstone.  He has varisies in his throat that have ruptured.  I head to Idaho to be there for him and his wife.

December 2012

Mom needs a hip revision surgery.  I spend the next 3 months in and out of a care facility/hospitals, 4 weeks with no hip, 1 hip revision, and 2 slipped out of sockets with her.  Learned all about patients rights and how to be a good physical therapist.

March 2013

Get a frantic phone call from my cwauson April.  Her four year old daughter has just been diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.  Go up to the hospital in Twin Falls and spend the weekend with her.  Have her give me my shots, so that when it is time for her to start giving them to her daughter it won't be so scary.  

I did get her out of the hospital for one night.  My awesome baby brother got us a room at a hotel with his sky miles.  Her husband stayed overnight with Alyssa.  April had gone on about 36 hours with little or no sleep.  Now, you all know, when we are together, we do a lot of giggling and laughing.  Took her out to eat.  I'm surprised we didn't get asked to leave the restaurant.  I mean, really.  We needed to just let everything else go that night and laugh.  Which we did.  Stomach hurting laughter.   Got back to the room, she plopped on the bed, said give me 10 minutes, and was out for the rest of the night.  

What else is going on?  Well, since there are jobs, but no one is in the mood to hire me, I decided to volunteer at Primary Children's Outpatient Services in the Riverton Hospital by my house.  I LOVE IT.  I work the front desk and tell people where to go.    In a nice way.  Geez, as if I would be mean to those little tykes.   

I Can't Take Her Anywhere, Number 2

My cousin April is in town.  Oh dear lord, we have way too much fun together.  Just thought I would share this little video we made today.

Day Two, I Can't Take Her Anywhere

If you haven't read Day One of The Awesome Adventures of April and Dazee, you really should.  I promise, if you pay for us to come hang out with you, you will not regret it.  It will be the most fun you have had in a long time.

Day Two started out going to see The Hunger Games with my daughter and son-in-law.  Oh-My-Goodness.  Loved, loved loved this movie.  It was all sorts of awesome.  This scene....big huge tears rolling down my face.  

Next up on our day, catching a ride on Trax to head downtown to see the new City Creek Center.  It just opened last Thursday, March 22.  We went on Sunday, so none of the stores were opened because, well, because I live in Utah.  I need say no more.  

We got on in Daybreak.  First of all, the train was sitting there for a while.  We bought our tickets and all of the sudden the train rang it's little bell and started rolling.  WAIT, WAIT, running ensued, arms waving, screaming at the top of our lungs, STOP, STOP.  Phew, he saw us.  

We were the only ones on the train.  Oh no, not a good thing.  Ok, its an awesome thing, because I'm with my equal in weirdness, so we had to take photo's like this.

Here she is waving to the cars that have to wait for us to go by.  

After one train change, we get to our destination.  Dudes, City Creek is a big deal for us in the city of salt.  Big name stores have arrived.  Some of them you guys have, but we never have.  I have to say, we are growing up.  Tear, tear.

This is part of the creek that the center is named after.  It was so peaceful and pretty.

And a look from the 2nd floor

One of the big name stores that we now have in town.  Here's April praying for that big ole huge diamond sitting in the window.  

Michael Kors.  I love him.  He is on my favorite all time show, Project Runway.  And yes, I need to get my hair done, please don't bring that up.

For the life of me I can't remember the name of this store, but April is contemplating becoming a live mannequin. 

This is my all time favorite photo of the whole day.  They have these doggy waste bags throughout the mall.  April just had to do her impression of the dog.  Have I mentioned, I love this girl.

Lastly, here she is, having been worn out by all the walking I made her do.  

The evening ended with watching another of my favorite movies, THE HELP.  

Miss April hadn't seen it yet.  Hey, she lives in Podunk, remember.

The Cousin Adventures plus More Craziness

Happy Monday, or Crap it's Monday, whichever the case may be.  :)

What a great 4 day weekend I had.  Don't be all jealous now.  Some of you have had awesome adventures as of late, so shut it.

Things started off Thursday with my anniversary.  Nice day.  Yes, we went to Home Depot.  Got our favoritest sandwiches in the world, Grinders 13 Pepper Steak, loaded with onions and tomatoes.  Hot peppers on the side.  Came home, slathered on some miracle whip and delighted tastebuds insued. 

Now for a few pictures, just to keep you interested.

GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!  I would love to see this building in person. 

This I saw on fellow blogger Coffeepot's site on Saturday and thought it was so true.  Yeah, things can always get worse.  (I stole this from him without asking, oops)

Another fellow femalelow blogger, Baby Sister, whom I'm about to put out an APB on, had this on her site when she first started blogging.  Yeah, I'll hold on to something forever.  I myself would fall in the #13 category, if I was still PMS'ing.  (jealous just a smidge, aren't ya?)

Ok, on with the weekend.

Friday morning, the day of all days finally arrives, my cousin April is in town.  You would never know that she is 20 19 years younger than me.  She acts soooo much older.  Ok, we both act 16 when we are together, but that's ok.  This was her as I was zooming through town to get us to her hair appointment on time.

I kid.  But I would love this painted on the side of my car. 

After being gone from 9 in the morning until 8 that evening, we were bushed.  But we HAD to have a bedtime snack.  Her idea.  Chocolate cake donuts with chocolate peanut butter cup ice cream on top.  She put the ice cream away, and off to watch Ghost Hunters we went.   We decided to go to bed early because, well, she was already asleep.  Next morning, as I was getting the creamer out of the REFRIGERATOR for our coffee, low and behold, this is what my eyes beheld. 

One of these things, doesn't belong here.  One of these things just doesn't belong, can you tell which thing doesn't belong here, be-fore I finish my song.  Did you find it boys and girls?  Will the ice cream still be good since it was in the fridge?  It wasn't melted all over the shelf or anything.  We shall see.  If I get extreme food poisoning, then we will know to just throw it out next time.

I've saved the best for last.  Now, if you are easily offended, please just don't go any further.  My sick sense of humor is about to come out. 

When I went to pick up April, there were too many cars parked in front of her mother-in-laws house.  So I had to pull in front of the next door neighbors.  Now, the way they were parked were not length wise, but pulling in like you had a parking space.  So your car faced the house.  Are you following here.  Ok.  Good. 

I turn off my car, text her that I'm there, look up at the tree sitting in front of my window and this is what I see.

Innocent enough.  Unless you are Dazee and sick and wrong.  I hurry out of the car, help her lug her stuff to my car, and point out the tree.  Being that we are 16 year old girls at heart, much hysterical laughter insued.

When I took her home on Saturday afternoon, knowing full well that I don't go anywhere without my camera, well, we just needed to take a picture.  I love April, she is game for just about anything. 

Behold, I give you

April and the Tree

OMG, look at her face.  That girl freaking cracks me up.   

ps:  sure hope the neighbors weren't watching.  

I have to say, between spending time with the hubster, and my cwauson, it was the best Anniversary/Easter weekend EVER.

You Know You're Having Too Much Fun - Chapter 2

What a weekend.  My oh my.  Remember last time my cousin was in town.  I wrote all about it in Chapter 1 .  Well, she was in town for another fun filled weekend. To start the weekend off right, we headed to a local place for a nummy breakfast.  It became a whole lot nummier when some men in uniform showed up.  Yeah, I'll take fireman number 1 with cream and sugar please.  I have to say, my cousin was "pretending" to take a picture of me.  Yup, that's my big arm in the picture.  What a girl.   

We were supposed to have uninterrupted us time for Saturday and Sunday.  "Supposed" to being the key word.  They were coming here for Thanksgiving anyway, but then her husbands grandma died, so his whole family came to town.  Funeral was Friday.  Oh, but hey, since everyone is here, husbands sister decided, hell, lets get married on Saturday.  Ummmmm, alrighty then.  You have now cut into our time.  But cousin cleared it with the bride and groom that Dazee could go to the family only wedding.  (much to the displeasure of girl talking to guy in picture below)

Here is cousin at the wedding.  One of the other sisters (also in this picture) decided that they would stream ribbon on the chairs, ON THE SIDE THAT EVERYONE NEEDS TO GET IN THE SEATS ON.  So you had to lift yourself up over the darn things to get in the row.  Yeah, it took three shots with the camera to get the fake trip just right, but hey, if you can't have fun at a wedding, then it's just not worth it.  Notice the arrows pointing out the flowers.  These were the flowers from grandma's funeral.  ????????

Next stop, Time for hair.  Yippee-ya-hooey.  At least they know we are goonballs there.  This is the color I'm getting my hair done in.  I bet you can hardly wait to see how the blue looks.

While I'm sitting under the dryer my cousin and her hair girl were talking about me.  Oh, they were pretending they were trying to talk to me.  It turned into a booger war.  Yup, shooting pretend boogers across the room at each other.  Yeah, I'm in my 50's, and your point is?

This is me sporting the fine mohawk Santa look.  Don't be jealous

This is cousin sporting the very popular Little House on the Prairie look. 

Oh yes, we are rocking the looks.

And ta-da.  Cousin's look.  She's working it.  Strike a pose.  Vogue

Santa Dazee look.  Not so rocking it.  At least I showed you a picture.  Hey, where's the freaking blue?

 I have to say, I have the funnest times ever with my cousin.  We laugh so freaking hard that my stomach hurts for days. We will rent ourselves out to you for any "FUN NEEDED AT" adventures.  You pay the airfare and hotel fees, we'll provide the entertainment.  :)