Monday, October 29, 2012

Attention All Future Companies That Have The Guts To Hire Me

As you have heard me talk about, I am in the market for a new job.  It's been almost a year.  In an effort to broaden my horizons, I have changed it up a bit.

Dazee Dreamer
Office Manager/Administrative Assistant

Over 30 years of motherhood managing and wifely duties;  promoted from purchasing groceries to motherhood in 2 years; very reliable and great at multitasking; proactive; take life by the horns and run with it.

     at least 5 wpm
     10 Key
     I probably have that many on my key ring
     I can point with power
     Can speak at least 1000 wpm
     In every task I undertake
     Husband Negotiations
     Self explanatory
     No problem spending the money and paying the bills
     Sensitive HR Paperwork
     Can hide sensitive paperwork with the best of um
     See AR
     Bank Deposits
     Easy Peasy

Ability to draw people to me
Of course, I will be drawing stick figures, but I can do it
Always Watching Our For The Households Bottom Line
          I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, Cuz I'm a  woman, Double U...O....M...A..N.
          I can swear like a sailor, or be as pleasant as a child.  Of course, I can also have temper
          tantrums like a kid.
          Hire me at your own risk.
Job History

          Salt Lake City, Utah
          11/1977 to 10/2012

I'm thinking of sending this resume along with my real one, to my future employers. 
I'm Crazy Dazee, don't you know.  


  1. lmbo that is priceless and sure to get some attention..

  2. ROTFLMFAO over the words per minute. I think I'm a little less than that, but I did have ten keys!

  3. This one is a lot better than the ones that I've seen cross my desk from time to time.

  4. Send it! Anyone would be crazier than we are not to hire you!