Thursday, April 8, 2010

What's In A Sneeze

Sneezing. It's one of those facts of life. Problem is, there are good times to sneeze and bad times to sneeze. Let's discuss.

I'm sure you already know that when you sneeze you close your eyes. This can be dangerous if you are in rush hour traffic. You have to make sure you are a fair amount of distance from the car in front of you when the sneeze finally happens. I dare you to try to keep those eyes open when you sneeze. Triple dog dare you!!

Then there is the dreaded, I really need to pee and a sneeze is coming on. Yes, had this one happen today while at work. Working, working, oh my, I really need to go. Working, working, still haven't gone. Yikes, here comes a sneeze. Uh oh, sneeze happens, and what else. Ladies? At least the ones of you that have had babies. Say it with me, oh dear, a dribble. Oh goodie, now I need to make it to the restroom without the floodgates opening. Darn sneeze.

Speaking of having babies. There is the sneeze that decides it wants to grace you with it's presence while you are standing. My last baby was 10 lbs 4 oz. And yes, I did have him 24 years ago, but if you are like me, you still feel like you might just lose your innards if you sneeze while standing. And I know you all do the cross the leg thing when sneezing and standing. You can't fool me. I've seen it.

Good thing those sneezes feel so damn good. Just sayin'


  1. OMG! I so hate sneezing while I'm driving! And I've been doing it alot lately. My car needs to be detailed, it's a dusty mess! Anyways, so I hate the drivng along and then you have to sneeze and your eyes close-It scares me! AND yes, any lady who has had a baby-totally understands the peeing your pants when you sneeze syndrome-I do! Looks like my friend Renee is following you now! She is great! Have a great day!

  2. i HAVE tried to keep my eyes open. impossible! i'm pretty sure the force of a sneeze is strong enough to make your eyes pop out of your head, so the involuntary action is actually a good thing.

  3. learned from LFMF (learn from my fail) that same muscles control sneezing and peeing. brain doesn't always see difference bwahahaha!

  4. Good god, the allergies this spring have been BRUTAL on me!!! I swear this oak pollen is going to be the death of me. I've had my share of all the sneezes you just described, and have found that the best way to combat the dribble sneeze is to wear a pad or pantiliner. Even when it's wasted because I didn't get a thing on it, I feel so much less nervous about myself all day's great. =) I know, TMI, but it really does help! LOL And I TOTALLY agree....sneezing just feels great! All that pent up tension released...aaahhhh. =) I get really pissed when a sneeze gets stifled out in some way!