Thursday, April 15, 2010

Can I Be Blunt?


Actually, I really dislike blunt people. You know the ones I'm talking about. You've worked with them. Are related to them. Are "friends" with them. I used to work with a girl that would always let me know the minute I walked in that I looked like shit. "wow, your hair looks bad today". Oh really, I know my f-ing hair looks bad today. You didn't need to bring it up. I already didn't want to come to work because of my hair, SO GET OFF MY CASE!!!

My daughter has a SIL that is blunt. I've been around her and would like the smack the crap out of her whenever she talks. Is this some kind of learned behavior? Do you feel so bad about yourself that you have to make others feel bad too. Or do you think you were put on this earth to let people know all the rotten things in life.

But the thing that really sent me over the edge on BLUNT PEOPLE is a "supposed" friend of my cousin. She is the mother of 4 children, ranging from 11 to 15 months. Her daughter just turned 3 the other day and so she threw a birthday party for her at her local park. Now, little kids and parks equals tired kids and moms at the end of the party. My cousin's daughter was getting tired. Her friends little boy was chasing her wanting her bag of candy. Her daughter turned around and hit this poor little boy in the face with her bag of candy. Being the good mother that she is, she ran over to her daughter, told her to apologize, put her in time out told his mother that she was sorry. Do you know what this "friend" did? Turned to her little boy, who is freaking 2, and said, "Reed you need to tell Amy that she is a bitch". Can you believe that? Telling a 2 year old to call another child a bitch. WTF!!! If it were me, there would have been a huge name calling, cat fight. And then I would wash my hands of her.

I think blunt people are in the category of abusive people. Maybe they have had a rough childhood. Maybe they don't know any better. But you know what. My childhood wasn't always a bed of roses either. But I never, ever intentionally say things that are meant to be blunt. And I'm sorry if I have offended you if you are blunt. But people need to realize that the person you are being blunt to could be having the most horrible rotten day already, and you just sent them over the edge. I've seen it happen to my daughter, and I've seen it happen to my cousin. The despair in their calls, the self worth that it affects.

This world needs to be a nicer place. So let it begin with you.

8 comments:

  1. Amen sista! I mean, mother! haha! First, I'm really curious to know who the lady was at work that would say that about your hair. Karma baby! I'm counting on that being said to her now. And that whole story about the little boy and Amy just breaks my heart. First of all, Caleb loves to chase his little sister around, if he was chasing another little girl around wanting her candy i would be right on him telling him NO! So this whole thing could have been prevented if the mother was actually being a mom to her son. I also really worry about the kind of man he will be someday. For heavens sakes, it's his mom telling him to call another little girl a bitch!! He's going to think it's ok to do/say whatever he wants to women, and that's just scary!

    I'm so glad I have compassionate parents. You and dad both. Love, care, and are nice. You aren't out to hurt others or look down on them. Some of these people I think are just so unhappy with their own selves and are so angry at the world that they have to put other people down to feel better. It's not a way to live.

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  2. there's a difference between being blunt and just being down right rude. i think some people think that "telling it like it is" is cool...they must watch too much Dr. Phil.

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  3. I actually agree with anonymous. I hate beating around the bush. I see no point in telling someone they look great in a dress while we're shopping and sending them out into the world looking less than their best.

    HOWEVER.

    The conversation should not go:

    "That dress makes you look like a deranged lollipop."

    It could easily go:

    "That one's ok but I think we can find something better."

    So, you can be truthful without being nasty. Tact is the key here folks.

    And encouraging your child to call someone else a bitch? Seems uncool to me at any age.

    Don't worry, I'm stepping down from my soap box now.

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  4. I agree with you KLZ. On the telling the truth nice, and the bitch comment. I'm right up there on that soap box with you!!

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  5. I agree!!!! Tact is the thing the rude, blunt people are lacking. :)

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  6. I agree with the others, you can be honest yet in a nice way...although it takes some practice LOL.

    Shame on that mother for telling her 2 yr old to call another person a bitch!

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