Oh, My, Goodness. This has been a week. Where do I begin, to tell the story of what.....oops, wrong song. Hooking up with Christy and Boobies, because, well, you see, I have a few things to get off my chest.
Speak of a freaking wet week. Frack you mother nature. I recorded this video yesterday because we were on our 3rd straight day of rain. No end in sight. Don't worry, Mr. Dazee already knows I'm a wack job. I did warn him I was going to do it. Just don't watch it honey.
Notice how well you can see the road and the other drivers. What? You can't. Yeah, say it with me, Dumb A motorcycle dude. What the frack was he thinking?
Now for the non weather related news of the week.
I need to give myself a big ole frack you for opening mouth, inserting foot award.
My mouth DOES NOT listen to my brain. Or better yet, my brain is super mad at my mouth, because it doesn't tell it to not say EVERY, FREAKING, THING that is on my mind. I want to give a big ole apology to my kids, their spouses, and my grandkids for talking about my funeral. I will just put it all on a word document so they can find it at the appropriate time. And ouch, my teeth are digging a big ole hole in my tongue now. They are trying to help the brain/mouth fight.
I got this new chair at work.
Yes, it's one of those cool, mesh, make my back feel good kind of chairs. One thing you need to know. Think of it as a Dazee Public Service Announcement.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, fart while sitting in this chair.
It does not hide any "signs" of what you just did. If you do let one rip, by all means, pray with all your might that someone does not come into your office before the room clears out. You're welcome.
Lastly, but certainly not leastly (its a word, I consulted Dazee Dictionary), I am hereby going to prove to all of you that thought I was a devil woman, that you thought right.
Horns and all. :)
Where is Gene Kelly when you need him?
ReplyDeleteWhen did you sound off about your funeral? Was it on your blog? Did I miss it? Am I brain dead again?
Love that chair.
Oh...and my, oh, my, you are SUCH a devil woman (lucky thing, you)!
ReplyDeleteWow Dazee! I still am laughing at your video! That was pretty damn funny! Wow.:D
ReplyDeleteYes what a wonderful video and now I must blow my brains out ....Thanks
ReplyDeleteI LOVE your video, daft dazee!!!
ReplyDeleteHave an awesome weekend
Its Friday's Shoegasm - go link up!
You crack me up. Love you devil woman
ReplyDeleteOh that video made me laugh so hard. And that picture of your hair made me giggle.
ReplyDeleteI loved the video, that little side kick was awesome :) Those horns fit you well my dear :) LOL at the chair/fart...eeks.
ReplyDeleteToo funny!
ReplyDeleteDo not fart while sitting on this chair. Almost made me spit out my coffee.
I want to post that at my front door! "Beware, no farting or you will be evicted quickly!"
Lisa
Wow Miss Dazee that's quite a do. And would you please, please send me the rain you don't want.
ReplyDeletePlease send some of that rain down to Texas. We are in a drought, and not allowed to water the lawn, or play outside on the slip-n-slide.
ReplyDeleteYou are weird and I love it!
ReplyDeletepicklesinmyass.blogspot.com
OMG! You made me shoot diet coke out my nose! Too bad we don't live in the same city! You would make a fabulous addition to our little group of crazy women.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the cool prompt for Jenny's Saturday Centus! It was my cup of tea!!