Thursday, December 9, 2010

Life Changing Moments


Psych, they really weren't life changing, but I drew you in, didn't I.  

 Me and the Hubby went to Costco the other day. No, we are not members, and I don't see us becoming one anytime in this century.   Why did we go you ask?  Hubby saw an ad for something he wanted.  Not knowing how the whole process works, we went to "member services".  I asked the lady how it all works.  She begins the explaining, in her heavy accent, my eyes started glazing over.  All I hear is 100 bucks, money back, 50 bucks, no money back, only American Express.  I start banging my head on the desk, hubby says, we're outta here, we leave.  As we are trying to get out of the maze called the parking lot, I see a few people coming out with like 2 things in their basket.  TWO THINGS PEOPLE!  Why in the hell would you put yourself through the agony to come out with a gallon of milk?  Breathing, breathing.

Moving on.  Being the great and awesome sister that I am, hey, she said it, I went to not 1 but 2 parties with her last night.  I'll start with the second one.  It was her company party.  The life changing moment at that party was, I AM TOTALLY WORKING FOR THE WRONG COMPANY!  Suffice it to say, the amount of money that they put out for the party is about $30,000 more than the party that I put together for the company I work for.  They brought in comic Brian Regan

He was hilarious.  Then they gave out "gifts" of which I won't go into because, well, I'm extremely jealous and you don't want to see a grown woman cry.  Fun times.

The first party of the night was a good ole "church" gathering of the women.  First of all, yes, the church is still standing.  I know you were all concerned that it should have been struck by lightning.  All is well.  Secondly, I was once again reminded why I don't do those things anymore.  Little groups of women gossiping chit-chatting.   Sidebar:  we had to go to this party cuz my sister had to sing.  During dinner, I can't rightly remember what the conversation was about, but it had something to do with men, a subject that my ears will always go full attention for.  It was either about bald men or black men (yes, a room full of Caucasian women).  Forgetting that I wasn't chatting with you, my blogging buddies, I blurt out, well, my boyfriend is black and bald.  OMG, you could have heard a pin drop.  I even got "the look", and then the "lets pretend that we are kind and compassionate" look.  At this point, seeing the error of my ways, I say, "well, he is my boyfriend, BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW IT."   And then, get this, they didn't even know who he was.  What The.......

(Shameless picture of boyfriend)  
The life changing moment.  That I truly appreciate all you blogging buddies.  You get me.  You get that I just have a crush.  You get my jokes (I hope), and the best thing of all, you don't judge me.  Well, maybe you do, but I don't have to see you "chit-chatting" about it.  You people rock.  Give yourself a hand.