Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Perfect Pleasant People

Dear Jenny, my dog ate my homework.  Oh wait, I don't have a dog.  My bad.

Today, our assignment it brought to us by the letter 

Sweet.  The letter P.  This shouldn't be hard.  Or is it.  

I first thought I would talk about what I woke up to Wednesday morning.
A big huge ole PIMPLE on the end of my nose.  No that is not my nose, I don't have a 5 o'clock shadow.   It made me realize that Rudolf must have been a woman, and really didn't have a nose that was a beacon, but that SHE woke up with a huge old PIMPLE  on the end of her nose that Christmas Eve so very long ago.  Shining brightly for all the other reindeer to see.  Plus I know she is a she, because she stepped up to the plate, pimple nose in place, DIDN'T ASK FOR DIRECTIONS, and took the world by storm.  Yeah.  Put that in your pipe and smoke it.


Those wonderful things we are all blessed with.  I'm sure you have all dealt with many different types.  Lets discuss.  There will be a quiz.

PLEASANT:  This person is nice to be around.  Most of the time.  They smile, and laugh, and are positive.  Sometimes you want to smack um cuz they are just too darn nice.  

PISSED OFF:  Or grouchy.    These are the people that couldn't say a pleasant word if a rainbow was falling out of their mouth.  Mr. doom and gloom if you will.  Always there to tell you what is wrong with you, your hair, your makeup, why they hate working with you, etc etc.  Tell me you haven't ever worked with one of these.  Me, I'm lucky, I work with more than one of them.  

PULL YOU DOWNERS:  Woo is me, life is never good.  Nobody has it as bad as me.  Shudder.  Go spend some time with Miss Pleasant.  One of you will crack.

PLEASE LISTEN TO ME:  These are the types that like to hear themselves talk, and talk, and talk.  About nothing.  They don't have a switch in their mouth that they can turn off when words start tumbling out and you haven't heard the "whole conversation in their head".   Go ahead, do the head shake, you know what I'm talking about.

PLAYERS:  I'm so good looking.  I know you are looking at my face.  You want to be with me.  I can tell.  Let me give you my number.  Ummm, thanks, but no thanks.

PERFECT:  I am the king of the world.  I do no wrong.  I never make mistakes.  Do I have crooked teeth?  No, I'm perfect.  My nails are just the right length, and so is my hair.  My clothes are impeccable.  Please bow when I walk by.

And now, I must take my pleasant, pissed off, perfect body, and do something amazing.  

Jenny Matlock

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