Flip Off Friday 6.11.10

Its Friday. Woo-yippity-hooey. No, I'm not excited. Whatever gave you that idea? Plus it another round of Friday Flip Offs, brought to us by our good pal Gigi at http://www.kludgymom.com/.

Are you ready to rummmmmmmmbbbbllllleeeeee?

To the people that have their cell phones in their butt pockets with the "lock" off. And then your stupid ass keeps dialing my number and you are unaware that I keep answering the phone. Either get off your ass, or put it on lock. Until then...................

Dear makers of the fine pumps that go in lotion, soap, or other such bottles. Is it going to hurt you to make the damn thing a smidge longer so that it reaches to the bottom of the bottle. I'm tired of it getting about 2 inches from the bottom and then having to take the pump out and shake the lotion out. Geezo Peezo, my water fan I bought at Walmart little pump thing reaches clear to the bottom. DO IT, but until then, take this.........................

To the packagers of coffee filters. Must you pack them in such tight little groups of "insert number here", that you ruin one or two of them trying to get them apart to put in your coffee maker. If you don't wise up, I might just have to start buying the prefilled filters. How would you like that? So take this ........................

Dear Pain In My Foot. You are becoming a big freaking pain in my butt. I know you are doing your best to support my weight, but you make me look stupid when I'm walking. Get over yourself or take this............

To the creepy customer that was arrogant today. Oh wait, you are arrogant every day. Honestly, the world does not revolve around you. So you know what, I took a page out of Noelle's book, at Because Nice Matters, on how to deal with you. (Check her out at http://noelleplatt.blogspot.com/ because, she is awesome.) Anycreepyfart, don't come in my office while I'm eating lunch and say, "I always seem to interrupt you when you are having lunch". So in my best Noelle text voice, I said, "then don't come in during my lunch hour". Yeah, that felt good, and also take this and shove it where the sun don't shine!!!!!!

To my bra strap. Could you freaking stay on my shoulder. Are you trying to tell me that I don't have you "tight" enough? I think not. Are you trying to tell me that I have weird shoulders? No you dipshit, I don't. You just suck. So, all you bra manufacturers out there, a big fat................

Last, but not least, because, as my mom always told me, "last the best of all the game", Mr. Stupid Semi Driver. We Open at 7 am! I get there at 6:45. The gate is closed for a reason. I have to input a code to open said gate. Don't pull up after the gate closes and see me walking into the building and start honking your f-ing horn at me. I don't answer to honking horns. I heard receiving tell you to come in after 7. Why? because they won't be there to unload your ass until then!!!! Good thing the only other person there was kind enough to back a truck up to the gate to sensor it open, so you could pull in. And you even honked at him till the lightbulb went off in your head and said, my oh my, he must be backing up for me. So, you are the very lucking recipient of this weeks double ......................

I can't even begin to tell you how much better I'm feeling now.

Sidebar: Remember to come on back Sunday for another round of FO SUNDAY. Where you can link up a picture of something you have made, or bought, or even the recipe of something that resulted in a party in your mouth.